Day 2 of Laura.
Perhaps I should explain myself better.
Laura happens when all the little negative things that happen daily to me, that I shove back somewhere, resurface and present themselves. When Laura leaves, I also believe that these negative things leave with her. So I think I need Laura. What if Laura never presented herself? Would this negative space that I have keep getting bigger and bigger? No, I think this space has a limit.
Maybe what I need is a different remedy than Laura.
Laura funnels the negatives out just once in a while, but what about... a different form of Laura, something that maybe doesn`t present itself as clearly as Laura, but still gets the job done?
Mary Jane? I don`t know.
Today we went volunteering - we started building the decor for a play (Annie) that the local high school is presenting sometime in April.
I`m not going to complain about the job that I had (it was cutting strips of tinfoil and twisting them into long rope things) because I got my peace and zen.
Zen twisting aluminium foil. What do you know.
Tonight, we`re going to the bar (Freddy`s) with our Project Leader, for it is his last week with us. I`d feel like a loser if I didn`t go, and if I stayed at home tonight as Laura, so I kind of have to go.
Saturday is Ladies` Night at Freddy`s, so the gals pay like 8 bucks and get unlimited beer, or coupons for a bunch, one of the two. It changes.
As such, I only pay three bucks for the coat check, and I can mooch for the night.
If you don`t know me enough, I never get myself drunk, because I`d hate to rely on other people to get home safe, or I just don`t want to deal with all the troubles that inebriety entails, and also to keep my hair safe. Countless stories about shaved eyebrows when you wake up in the morning have kept me wary.
I like the taste of most beers, and I can drink quite a lot without getting drunk, which suits me just fine. There`s also loud dancing music, but I`m not sure if I`ll dance, because I don`t think Laura can dance.
Will I just lurk in a corner and look all shady for the night?
Who knows.
31/01/09
30/01/09
Pixie rust
Another Laura day.
Ha, ha.
You know, the frequency of these little mood swings of sorts is increasing.
Why can`t I just smile and be outgoing and whatnot and make Laura disappear?
Can`t I?
I don`t know, I don`t think I can, because then my outside does not coincide with my inside.
Work blows.
Almost got a CTI for sleeping on the job.
I had worked all morning in six feet of snow, and even with snowshoes, it really drains you. So by the afternoon, I was really exhausted, so I kind of dozed off during lunchtime, and woke up later. My ``boss`` was rather unhappy.
Now I need to make a little schedule of sorts to follow.
I really do work, it`s just, cutting branches over and over again is just awful. Also considering the fact that the work could be done four times as fast with an axe or chainsaw or something.
Baaaah.
Going out to the bar tomorrow with our PL, who is, very sadly, leaving us for greener pastures. :(
We get to meet our new PL, Patrick, sometime soon. He`s supposed to be just as cool as Pascalou.
Doing some big volunteer thing at a high school all day tomorrow.
See ya.
Actually, I might not see ya.
Ha, ha.
You know, the frequency of these little mood swings of sorts is increasing.
Why can`t I just smile and be outgoing and whatnot and make Laura disappear?
Can`t I?
I don`t know, I don`t think I can, because then my outside does not coincide with my inside.
Work blows.
Almost got a CTI for sleeping on the job.
I had worked all morning in six feet of snow, and even with snowshoes, it really drains you. So by the afternoon, I was really exhausted, so I kind of dozed off during lunchtime, and woke up later. My ``boss`` was rather unhappy.
Now I need to make a little schedule of sorts to follow.
I really do work, it`s just, cutting branches over and over again is just awful. Also considering the fact that the work could be done four times as fast with an axe or chainsaw or something.
Baaaah.
Going out to the bar tomorrow with our PL, who is, very sadly, leaving us for greener pastures. :(
We get to meet our new PL, Patrick, sometime soon. He`s supposed to be just as cool as Pascalou.
Doing some big volunteer thing at a high school all day tomorrow.
See ya.
Actually, I might not see ya.
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