"Two things that have haunted me most are the days when I
had to collect the paybooks; and when I left Bill Hubbard in
no-man's-land.
"I was picked up and taken into their trench. And I'd no
sooner taken two or three steps down the trench when I heard a
call, 'Hello Razz, I'm glad to see you. This is my second night
here,' and he said 'I'm feeling bad,' and it was Bill Hubbard,
one of the men we'd trained in England, one of the original
battalion. I had a look at his wound, rolled him over; I could
see it was probably a fatal wound. You could imagine what pain
he was in, he was dripping with sweat; and after I'd gone about
three shellholes, traversed that, had it been...had there been a
path or a road I could have done better. He pummeled me, 'Put
me down, put me down, I'd rather die, I'd rather die, put me
down.' I was hoping he would faint. He said 'I can't go any
further, let me die.' I said 'If I leave you here Bill you won't
be found, let's have another go.' He said 'All right then.' And
the same thing happened; he couldn't stand it any more, and I had
to leave him there, in no-man's-land."
15/07/08
11/07/08
My Curse
DragonForce @ Downsview Park August 8th.
Sonata Arctica and Nightwish @ The Docks September 2nd.
I will definitely go see Sonata Arctica & Nightwish, as they're right up there with my favourite bands.
DragonForce, I'm iffy about. I know I'm very snobbish with my music, but that DF concert seems disconcerting to me. Firstly, the tickets are 50 bucks, jacked up from 20 dollars when I went to go see them two years ago with my friend Danielle at the Opera House. That was one hell of a concert, it was fantastic, and hilarious, I'll try and spare you most of the details. There were these people in mail armor with a foam warhammer that they were waving about, that sort of thing. And hell, the band had so much friggin energy. I was tired from just standing the whole time, but they were jumping around flailing on their guitars and all. They were damn cool.
The thing I don't like about this concert that they're doing is that I have no doubt that there will be a bunch of flavour-of-the-month kids present who just happened to discover DragonForce with the song Through the Fire and the Flames on Guitar Hero, and they thought it sounded cool and decided "hell I'll go to this concert". I know I should feel fine about them going to a concert in which they shelled out their money for and that they should be allowed to enjoy Herman Li's shreddin' too, but it still annoys me.
As for Nightwish and Sonata Arctica, oh that will just be fantastic. The Sonata Arctica concert I went to back in September was effing awesome, they are one hell of a good band. Plus, they're not so totally mainstream that they still allow me to feel as though the music is for their fans, and not purely for the music industry. (I was sickened when I saw DragonForce on MTV the other day).
Alright, I didn't want to make a long post.
Bye.
Sonata Arctica and Nightwish @ The Docks September 2nd.
I will definitely go see Sonata Arctica & Nightwish, as they're right up there with my favourite bands.
DragonForce, I'm iffy about. I know I'm very snobbish with my music, but that DF concert seems disconcerting to me. Firstly, the tickets are 50 bucks, jacked up from 20 dollars when I went to go see them two years ago with my friend Danielle at the Opera House. That was one hell of a concert, it was fantastic, and hilarious, I'll try and spare you most of the details. There were these people in mail armor with a foam warhammer that they were waving about, that sort of thing. And hell, the band had so much friggin energy. I was tired from just standing the whole time, but they were jumping around flailing on their guitars and all. They were damn cool.
The thing I don't like about this concert that they're doing is that I have no doubt that there will be a bunch of flavour-of-the-month kids present who just happened to discover DragonForce with the song Through the Fire and the Flames on Guitar Hero, and they thought it sounded cool and decided "hell I'll go to this concert". I know I should feel fine about them going to a concert in which they shelled out their money for and that they should be allowed to enjoy Herman Li's shreddin' too, but it still annoys me.
As for Nightwish and Sonata Arctica, oh that will just be fantastic. The Sonata Arctica concert I went to back in September was effing awesome, they are one hell of a good band. Plus, they're not so totally mainstream that they still allow me to feel as though the music is for their fans, and not purely for the music industry. (I was sickened when I saw DragonForce on MTV the other day).
Alright, I didn't want to make a long post.
Bye.
Karma Aspiration Linger Entity Iodine Darwin Overcast
Ulysses Grievous Hawt Spectre Citron Ophilia Philharmonic Eyeless.
09/07/08
Just summer
Okay, well, since I got a couple questions, I figured I'd elaborate a bit on summer school.
It's at Earl Haig, a nice, behemoth of a school. It's huge. Not massive, but huge, with big windows and an Eaton Centre feel to the place. It took me forever to find my classroom on the first day. In the morning, I hear it's like an oven, but since my classes run from 12:30 to 3:15, it's nicely AC'ed by the time I arrive to the classroom.
The classroom is rather bland, nothing special.
The teacher is, simply said, a good math teacher. He's sort of an older version of Mr. Budnik (if you know him, he makes lots of corny references in whatever he teaches). Notable corny quotes from Mr. Neiderhauser(sp) include: "The Factor Theorem is applicable everywhere, in calculus, in engineering, with your girlfriend." and some others I can't remember, though some are cringers for sure.
He's very passionate about math, that's for sure. IMHO he's a better teacher than the one I had at Vaughan, but it doesn't matter too much now.
As for the course itself, it feels nice to be at the forefront of the class, after spending three annoying years in IB always being meh and near the bottom most of the time. I got a 92% on my math test today. Let me tell you, I haven't seen those beautiful numbers on a test in four friggin' years.
I distincly remember Grade Eight math, where I got highest mark on this exponents test, and hell I was surprised, because everyone else just did reallllllyyyy bad on it. It was wonderful, everyone had to retake it, but I didn't need to.
That's a bit of how I feel at summer school.
Like I said, summer school isn't bad at all. Though the commute is like 50 minutes, and I just stick to my own little desk in the class barely talking to anyone at all for a solid three hours, I don't mind.
The thing that does bother me is when I come back home and waste away. At least I don't have to deal with insomnia anymore though, that's an upgrade, but I have the feeling of wasting my last high school summer, much the same way I wasted all my other summers. It's not a cool feeling. And then there's the interpersonal troubles I gotta deal with too, but I'd rather not bring that up on a simple routine blog.
Barely two weeks before summer school's done, a month and a bit till Fan Expo, and I'll be receiving my travel destinations for September anytime now!
I'm excited for all those things, but dreading some other things, naturally.
Toodemeddles.
It's at Earl Haig, a nice, behemoth of a school. It's huge. Not massive, but huge, with big windows and an Eaton Centre feel to the place. It took me forever to find my classroom on the first day. In the morning, I hear it's like an oven, but since my classes run from 12:30 to 3:15, it's nicely AC'ed by the time I arrive to the classroom.
The classroom is rather bland, nothing special.
The teacher is, simply said, a good math teacher. He's sort of an older version of Mr. Budnik (if you know him, he makes lots of corny references in whatever he teaches). Notable corny quotes from Mr. Neiderhauser(sp) include: "The Factor Theorem is applicable everywhere, in calculus, in engineering, with your girlfriend." and some others I can't remember, though some are cringers for sure.
He's very passionate about math, that's for sure. IMHO he's a better teacher than the one I had at Vaughan, but it doesn't matter too much now.
As for the course itself, it feels nice to be at the forefront of the class, after spending three annoying years in IB always being meh and near the bottom most of the time. I got a 92% on my math test today. Let me tell you, I haven't seen those beautiful numbers on a test in four friggin' years.
I distincly remember Grade Eight math, where I got highest mark on this exponents test, and hell I was surprised, because everyone else just did reallllllyyyy bad on it. It was wonderful, everyone had to retake it, but I didn't need to.
That's a bit of how I feel at summer school.
Like I said, summer school isn't bad at all. Though the commute is like 50 minutes, and I just stick to my own little desk in the class barely talking to anyone at all for a solid three hours, I don't mind.
The thing that does bother me is when I come back home and waste away. At least I don't have to deal with insomnia anymore though, that's an upgrade, but I have the feeling of wasting my last high school summer, much the same way I wasted all my other summers. It's not a cool feeling. And then there's the interpersonal troubles I gotta deal with too, but I'd rather not bring that up on a simple routine blog.
Barely two weeks before summer school's done, a month and a bit till Fan Expo, and I'll be receiving my travel destinations for September anytime now!
I'm excited for all those things, but dreading some other things, naturally.
Toodemeddles.
Karma Aspiration Linger Entity Iodine Darwin Overcast
Ulysses Grievous Hawt Spectre Citron Ophilia Philharmonic Eyeless.
07/07/08
Deffo Summer School
Yeaaaaaah summer school. Alright, I know I don't rant enough on this blog (really, I don't do it that much), and I'm not about to start. Summer school isn't that bad. It's a small part of my summer (three hours per day, 15 hours per week). I hardly notice it. Besides, it's easy mode, and it's there because I got to slack off all year long. Now I must pay for it.
Basic format so far, is a quiz a day, test on tuesday and friday. Aced the last test. But the stuff, I mean, after having it done twice already, three time's a charm right?
The funny thing is, I passed the grade eleven IB math course with a low 70, and that shiz was harder than the stuff I did in grade twelve. And the stuff I did in grade twelve, I failed. Wonderful no?
Summer's chillz so far, deffo looking better than last year's where I was signed up on a raid four nights out of seven with my guild, Retaliation (may they R.I.P.).
And it seems I'm sleeping... just fine.
It has been a very, very long time since I can actually go to my bed, and sleep. The past five nights have been quite... wow. I fall asleep within ten minutes of closing my eyes, somewhere around there. That hasn't happened in months. I don't quite understand it. Maybe it's my summer school schedule (I haven't skipped anything yet!).
Well, it's about time I went to sleep, doncha think? Summer school in twelve hours :^).
Basic format so far, is a quiz a day, test on tuesday and friday. Aced the last test. But the stuff, I mean, after having it done twice already, three time's a charm right?
The funny thing is, I passed the grade eleven IB math course with a low 70, and that shiz was harder than the stuff I did in grade twelve. And the stuff I did in grade twelve, I failed. Wonderful no?
Summer's chillz so far, deffo looking better than last year's where I was signed up on a raid four nights out of seven with my guild, Retaliation (may they R.I.P.).
And it seems I'm sleeping... just fine.
It has been a very, very long time since I can actually go to my bed, and sleep. The past five nights have been quite... wow. I fall asleep within ten minutes of closing my eyes, somewhere around there. That hasn't happened in months. I don't quite understand it. Maybe it's my summer school schedule (I haven't skipped anything yet!).
Well, it's about time I went to sleep, doncha think? Summer school in twelve hours :^).
Karma Aspiration Linger Entity Iodine Darwin Overcast
Ulysses Grievous Hawt Spectre Citron Ophilia Philharmonic Eyeless.
25/06/08
"WAKE UP, GABBY"
Those are the words which woke me up from my bad slumber two mornings ago (and by morning, I mean 3:00 pm). It seems that a bunch of my buddies thought it unacceptable that I was to be found sleeping at such a time, when the sun has passed its zenith, that sort of thing. So you know what they did? They barged into my house and yelled at me. I could distinctly hear The Prom Queen's voice above all the others (hence the "WAKE UP GABBYYYY!"), but I could obviously hear others, some yelling obscenities which are sure to make anybody wake up. One of the group even had the guts to storm storm up to my bedroom whilst I was dozing and see the array of (free) horror movie posters on the wall, and the messiness of a normal teenager's room.
Truth be told, I suppose it was time I woke up, but still, they were not able to respect the fact that I had gone to sleep at 8:00 that morning, and it seemed utterly ridiculous to them that I should be sleeping while they had Rock Band set up at Devlin's house.
I guess they really needed a plastic-guitar guitarist for the band.
Fifteen minutes later, all woken up, I was at Devlin's house applying my not-so-epic Guitar Hero skillz to Rock Band's flimsy guitar on Jet's "Are you gonna be my girl?". The Prom Queen's a-singing, the Hippie's a-shreddin', and the drummer's, well, a-drummin', and we pulled off some ill "Unison Combos", which I think means that we hit the notes at the exact same time or something.
Before all you critics have anything to say about the nerdiness of playing cheap plastic instruments and trying to mimic real rockstars even though we've got nothing on them talent-wise, I'd like to refer you to the pillar of sanity that is XKCD:
And it was fun. It's even more fun when you have someone who really can't sing, like me, but luckily, I stayed on the guitar for most of the time, only stepping up as the singer for "Black Hole Sun" since I was the only one who knew the song.
Memorable quote:
Anyone like cherries? I have to climb on top of the shed-thing in the back and pick some cherries from the cherry tree, but there's always way too much. So if you like cherries, I don't think anyone would mind if you came and gathered your own little stock, make some pies, or something. They're good cherries. Usually.
Truth be told, I suppose it was time I woke up, but still, they were not able to respect the fact that I had gone to sleep at 8:00 that morning, and it seemed utterly ridiculous to them that I should be sleeping while they had Rock Band set up at Devlin's house.
I guess they really needed a plastic-guitar guitarist for the band.
Fifteen minutes later, all woken up, I was at Devlin's house applying my not-so-epic Guitar Hero skillz to Rock Band's flimsy guitar on Jet's "Are you gonna be my girl?". The Prom Queen's a-singing, the Hippie's a-shreddin', and the drummer's, well, a-drummin', and we pulled off some ill "Unison Combos", which I think means that we hit the notes at the exact same time or something.
Before all you critics have anything to say about the nerdiness of playing cheap plastic instruments and trying to mimic real rockstars even though we've got nothing on them talent-wise, I'd like to refer you to the pillar of sanity that is XKCD:
And it was fun. It's even more fun when you have someone who really can't sing, like me, but luckily, I stayed on the guitar for most of the time, only stepping up as the singer for "Black Hole Sun" since I was the only one who knew the song.Memorable quote:
"Me: Damnit! We only lasted two minutes on Foreplay!"
"KateS aka Prom Queen: Don't worry Gabby! We'll last longer this time!"
"Devlin, walking in: WTF?"
Anyone like cherries? I have to climb on top of the shed-thing in the back and pick some cherries from the cherry tree, but there's always way too much. So if you like cherries, I don't think anyone would mind if you came and gathered your own little stock, make some pies, or something. They're good cherries. Usually.
Karma Aspiration Linger Entity Iodine Darwin Overcast
Ulysses Grievous Hawt Spectre Citron Ophilia Philharmonic Eyeless.
23/06/08
La voie de raison
Je m'excuse, mon cher public, de m'exprimer, pour la toute première fois, en français sur mon blogue. Il y a certains d'entre vous qui seront absolument incapables de comprendre ce que j'écris. Il y a en d'autres, et je pense que vous serez la majorité, qui comprendront un peu, juste assez pour ne pas être totalement perdu. Ensuite, il y aura une ou deux personnes qui seront capables de comprendre tout ce que j'écris. Mais malheureusement, il n'y aura personne qui sera capable de comprendre ce que je veux vraiment exprimer en mes mots. Telle est la façon dont le blogue fonctionne.
Si vous êtes du premier groupe, vous êtes foutu, et ça ne sert pas à grand-chose d'essayer de continuer. Babel Fish et Google Translate seront des outils superficiels.
Si vous êtes du deuxième groupe, vous pouvez essayer de comprendre, mais je pense que vous allez vous ennuyer.
Si vous êtes du troisième groupe, peut-être que vous serez content d'avoir un peu d'air frais dans votre face.
Pourquoi est-ce que j'écris en français?
Plusieurs raisons.
Cela doit faire plusieurs années que j'ai réellement écrit quelque chose en français qui a de la qualité, et qui n'est pas juste de la merde qu'on nous dit d'écrire dans les classes de français à l'école. À vrai dire, je pense que je n'ai jamais écrit quelque chose en français de mon plein gré. Alors, voici ma chance, non?
C'est bien connu que les langues latines sont des langues expressives. C'est pour cela qu'en anglais, on les appelle les "romance languages". Donc, il est parfois plus facile, et ça fait plus de sens, pour moi, de m'exprimer en français, mais je ne le fais jamais.
Pourquoi aujourd'hui?
Je ne me sens pas très bien. Ça passe, ça passe, mais quand même, je suis rempli d'angoisse.
Mes raisons ne sont pas très évidentes. Disons qu'autour de moi, je vois de l'angoisse partout. Surtout dans mes amis, certains de mes amis, qui eux, passent des mauvais quarts d'heure chaque jour, et parfois, chaque nuit. Je ne les comprends pas très bien, mes nouveaux amis, j'ai de la misère à montrer de la compréhension avec leurs problèmes.
Et pire encore, c'est la façon dont ils agissent qui m'angoisse. L'exemple le plus évident, c'est de la façon qu'ils s'expriment à travers leurs mots, dans leur blogue, avec les conversations que j'ai à travers MSN, etc. Quand je les vois en personne, ils ont un air carrément différent, plus souvent que pas, content. Mais j'essaye de percer leurs façades, car je sais qu'ils utilisent cette technique pour se dissimuler du monde.
Le problème, c'est que moi-même, j'ai de la grande misère à m'exprimer de la façon dont je veux m'exprimer en personne. Je ne serais jamais capable de dire tout ce que j'écris maintenant en personne, je me trouve incapable de dire ce que je veux dire devant les personnes avec qui je veux le dire le plus au monde. Car je regarde leurs visages, (enfin, certains d'entre eux) et je ne suis pas capable de m'exprimer. Je me renferme.
Et cela, c'est très, très angoissant.
Ah oui, c'est aussi angoissant que je me trouve le soir sans rien à faire, et que je passe des nuits blanches à angoisser, dans mon lit, et tout seul, marchant dans la nuit.
Au revoir, je ne signe pas, car ma signature est en anglais.
Si vous êtes du premier groupe, vous êtes foutu, et ça ne sert pas à grand-chose d'essayer de continuer. Babel Fish et Google Translate seront des outils superficiels.
Si vous êtes du deuxième groupe, vous pouvez essayer de comprendre, mais je pense que vous allez vous ennuyer.
Si vous êtes du troisième groupe, peut-être que vous serez content d'avoir un peu d'air frais dans votre face.
Pourquoi est-ce que j'écris en français?
Plusieurs raisons.
Cela doit faire plusieurs années que j'ai réellement écrit quelque chose en français qui a de la qualité, et qui n'est pas juste de la merde qu'on nous dit d'écrire dans les classes de français à l'école. À vrai dire, je pense que je n'ai jamais écrit quelque chose en français de mon plein gré. Alors, voici ma chance, non?
C'est bien connu que les langues latines sont des langues expressives. C'est pour cela qu'en anglais, on les appelle les "romance languages". Donc, il est parfois plus facile, et ça fait plus de sens, pour moi, de m'exprimer en français, mais je ne le fais jamais.
Pourquoi aujourd'hui?
Je ne me sens pas très bien. Ça passe, ça passe, mais quand même, je suis rempli d'angoisse.
Mes raisons ne sont pas très évidentes. Disons qu'autour de moi, je vois de l'angoisse partout. Surtout dans mes amis, certains de mes amis, qui eux, passent des mauvais quarts d'heure chaque jour, et parfois, chaque nuit. Je ne les comprends pas très bien, mes nouveaux amis, j'ai de la misère à montrer de la compréhension avec leurs problèmes.
Et pire encore, c'est la façon dont ils agissent qui m'angoisse. L'exemple le plus évident, c'est de la façon qu'ils s'expriment à travers leurs mots, dans leur blogue, avec les conversations que j'ai à travers MSN, etc. Quand je les vois en personne, ils ont un air carrément différent, plus souvent que pas, content. Mais j'essaye de percer leurs façades, car je sais qu'ils utilisent cette technique pour se dissimuler du monde.
Le problème, c'est que moi-même, j'ai de la grande misère à m'exprimer de la façon dont je veux m'exprimer en personne. Je ne serais jamais capable de dire tout ce que j'écris maintenant en personne, je me trouve incapable de dire ce que je veux dire devant les personnes avec qui je veux le dire le plus au monde. Car je regarde leurs visages, (enfin, certains d'entre eux) et je ne suis pas capable de m'exprimer. Je me renferme.
Et cela, c'est très, très angoissant.
Ah oui, c'est aussi angoissant que je me trouve le soir sans rien à faire, et que je passe des nuits blanches à angoisser, dans mon lit, et tout seul, marchant dans la nuit.
Au revoir, je ne signe pas, car ma signature est en anglais.
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