Conspiracy

I've been asked a couple times why I'm so much into Paramore; why I go to all their shows, buy their memorabilia, and idolize Hayley. It's simple. Their songs lift my spirits and untangle my sometimes confusing reality. They help me explain the unexplainable, reason the unreasonable, and provide me with hope in my periods of despair.

So for my own sake, I figured I'd try and relate how I feel with some of their songs. Here's the first one. It's not my favourite, but I relate to it at an intellectual and somewhat emotional level. It's called Conspiracy, from their first studio album All we know is falling.

 

How I relate to this song
The song begins with the lyrics:

Please speak softly, for they will hear us
And they'll find out why we don't trust them. 

There was a time in my life where I was very paranoid; where I was locked up in an institution and the psychiatrists and the nurses were trying to help me and get me to talk about what I was thinking. I never could trust them enough to tell them anything, so I spoke softly to Lyra instead.

The bridge goes:
Where can I turn? 'Cause I need something more
Surrounded by uncertainty, I'm so unsure
Tell me why I feel so alone 
'Cause I need to know to whom do I owe

I relate this to my paranoia and loneliness, unable to make decisions on my own. And unsure who to turn to.

The chorus starts:
Explain to me this conspiracy against me

There was a time in my life when that would have been nice.

Signed,
Kaleidoughscope